slip of the tongue

back when i was younger i couldn't keep a secret. now that i'm older, well, i still have a difficult time. now, i am not talking things that are said in confidence. i am talking presents. gifts. things you buy that you are so excited about. you just can hardly contain yourself. back in my babysitting days a family that I sat for had two young children at the time. the older of the two was just able to talk. so, one day her mom had gone to the local art fair. and purchased a gift for her husband. when she got home she showed it to me. it was a beautiful wooden cutting board. and when her little girl asked her what it was the mom told her it was a hockey puck. brilliant. that must have been over twenty years ago. and i am thinking my mom could have used that line with me. a few times. i can't remember how old i was but my mom had orchestrated this grand scheme, back in the day, to get hbo hooked up at our house for one of my dad's christmas presents without my dad knowing anything about it. i am pretty sure she had to take some time off work. a couple of times. for the thing to finally get hooked up. you know, the tan box. with the black slide buttons on top. with no remote. seriously. so, christmas eve finally arrives with much anticipation. we are all opening gifts. one person at a time. it's my dad's turn. he opens up a box. it's a sweater. and out of my mouth comes, 'oh. i thought it was hbo.' nope. not that box. i really did think it was hbo. and i really did think my mom was going to kill me. and you can bet every year after that when someone opens a box the phrase 'i thought it was hbo' comes out. at some point. every. single. year. after. now, fast forward thirty some years. my mom's birthday is in september. earlier in the summer i had bought my mom a hose reel basket that she had admired at a local store for her birthday. i had it sitting on top of the freezer in the garage to keep it out of the way. one weekend my mom had come down to visit. one night we were all getting in the car to go for ice cream. as we all loaded in my son yells, 'look, gran! your present!' i immediately asked will if he remembered that the gift was supposed to be for gran's birthday. next month. without hesitation will yells, 'surprise!' and i thought it was hbo.