fork you

i have sworn like a sailor ever since i can remember. perhaps it is due to the fact i heard my father's catch phrase you no good, god damned, son of a bitch and bastardly prick of a whore since i was in the fourth grade. and could correct him if he missed a part. i am not saying that is why. but just a thought. and i am sure it doesn't surprise you that my all-time favorite cuss word is the mother of all cuss words, eff. it just rolls off of the tongue the easiest. and you can say it under your breath without detection. most times. unless you have a two year old. with super sonic hearing. so, the other day i was enjoying an entire 39 seconds to myself. eating breakfast. will was up and had already eaten his breakfast. just as i went to take my first bite sophie chimed in. ready to get up. i said eff. under my breath. and will repeats, at the top of his lungs, eff. clear. as. day. i was kind of thinking to myself that if he had to swear at least he picked my favorite. well, thank god for the fork in my hand. i said no honey, fork. and that was the end of that. for now.