today

sucked.

update

no, i didn't wake up to find these outside the window this morning. i found this photo on wood tv 8, of course, much to my surprise.

pink panther strikes again

i have lived in michigan for 36 years. i have seen it snow for 36 years. well, some of those years i can honestly say i can't remember the snow but i can assume it did. apparently, i missed something. the oddity known as snow rollers. leave it to indiana to come up with this gem. picture, if you will, a hostess ho-ho, a jelly roll or a roll of insulation but made of snow. oh yeah, this makes the news. i can only assume the cause of this is when wind gets high enough that it picks up a swath of snow in any given width and the momentum creates a hay bale type roll. people actually send their photos in, measured of course, to see who owns the largest roller. i could say the same about my blog but don't people have anything better to do? i am thankful for one thing. this did not happen in grand rapids. wood tv 8 would have cut into a show every time one of these things blew across someone's yard. suzanne geha would be out in a cornfield trying to interview it. that's probably where larry nienhaus went. indiana. so he could interview snow rollers. even with a meteorologist for each day of the week they would still hire another one just for snow roller reporting. i wish we had some in our yard so i could post a photo. or make the news.

who's on first

ever since my dad retired a few years back tv watching at my parent's house has become an irritant. my mom has also retired but i don't think she has sat down since. my dad, however, watches tv. a lot. and it's not that he watches tv it's just what he watches. lifetime. if he remembers it's eleven o'clock he will turn it to the price is right. he also doesn't like commercials. he also has control of the clicker. it's no wonder we all have adhd. just when your brain gives in and gets sucked into one of those lifetime movies, which all have the same plot with different actors, the channel changes. we were reminded of this on our recent visit for christmas. so, it's no wonder that when my husband and i have a project to do my mom shuffles him down to our house to get him moving. my dad is a great carpenter and we appreciate all of his hard work. the last time he came down he wanted to go to that mexican place with the good chips and salsa. well, there are lots of mexican restaurants so i wasn't sure which one he meant. he said you know it starts with a c - the one that jeff cederna kid works at. i said chi chi's (which is no longer in business) because the last time i saw jeff that is where he was working. no, not chi chi's my dad said. i started to name every mexican restaurant in town including la senorita back from my college days in a different city. nope. finally out of pure desperation, i asked him where the restaurant was located. he said there was one in front of home depot by the airport and another one across from arnie's. i said chili's. yeah, that's it, chili's my dad says. well, chili's is not a mexican restaurant and jeff cederna never worked there that i am aware. this conversation took fifteen minutes mind you. now, when my dad comes down for a visit we all know where we are going to eat. the mexican restaurant that isn't mexican and where jeff cederna never worked. thank you to jeff cederna who unknowingly participates in our family joke. by the way, jeff currently works for labelle management at bennigan's. that italian restaurant...

deep thoughts

last night i was doing the kids' laundry and i thought to myself i never get tired of finding cars and books in the bottom of my son's laundry basket. i never get tired of looking at my daughter's cheeks or...

...listening to my kids growling back and forth
...hearing my son's feet hit the floor
...looking at my husband's eyelashes
...my mom's lasagna
...the smell of autumn

i do get tired of cleaning however.

noah

last weekend on our way home after visiting santa we got lost. we ended up taking the scenic way home and boy am i glad we did. we found out where dr. seuss lives. why edwardsburg, michigan, of course. take a look at this piece of work.

is it a boat?

does it even float?

is someone trying to get my goat?

no, i don't think it will fit in my coat.

i am quite certain there is room on this boat for a case of schlitz. pull tabs no doubt. i am not sure if this is seaworthy but the craftsmanship is second to none. i guess they couldn't decide if they wanted a paddle boat, pontoon boat or a double decker bus so they just lumped them all together for one sweet ride.

86753Onieeeiiiiine

i only recently became part of the phenomenon known as facebook. i know, i know but we are fortunate to even get internet service through a tin can don't you think? in doing so i have found friends i hadn't spoken to in quite some years and it has been fun. fumbling through i happened upon a group from my graduating high school class. among the discussion was where to have our twenty year reunion. did i just read twenty? yes, i did. my god, my mom must be old. anyway, the other day i accidentally got a glimpse in a mirror. these things happen for a reason. because at that very moment i realized a great place for the reunion. jenny craig.

fa rah rah rah rah

over 14 rivers, through lots of woods, watching emmet otter's jugband christmas, veggie tales, half of shrek and one stop at mcdonald's to grandmother's house we went. after arriving we soon discovered we had forgotten dog food, among other things, and it was off to the store. just what we wanted to do on christmas eve afternoon. i didn't think wal-mart could get any worse than a regular day. i thought wrong. then, just when my last nerve was about to give up my husband decides he needs a new pair of shoes. right now. it's 3 p.m. on christmas eve afternoon, it's pouring rain with drops as big as tennis balls, freezing, windy and did i mention it was 3 p.m. on christmas eve afternoon? i suddenly realize that after being gone for an hour, with the unexpected shoe shopping, we took our car with all of the diapers, food and bottles. rushing back to my parent's house we get the call. i am assuming it is my mother frantic to tell me the kids need their diapers or the specific brand of cracker we buy because hers just doesn't taste right. although what i heard on the other end of the phone was certainly unexpected it was not shocking considering this happens at their house about every 3 1/2 days. the power is out. sure enough, we turn the corner and there was the fire engine. a christmas miracle, alright. firemen at our house for christmas. this was the best present. ever. so, we spent the afternoon waiting for power guy to show up and decorated cookies for santa under the rapidly deteriorating daylight. grumbling because the griswold's across the street were still able to pull their fair share off of the grid. and then it came to me. we were going to get to go out for chinese just like ralphy! i, of course, have always wanted to do this just to say we did but now we had no other option. nope. my dad wouldn't even entertain the thought. wouldn't even go and try it. so, we dined on ham sandwiches. i would have preferred my mom's homemade potato soup, freshly baked cheese rolls and shrimp cocktail as our yearly tradition predicts but it just wasn't going to happen this year. so after hooking up the generator and running 97 extension cords into the house we at least had some light. about an hour later, power guy shows up and we have power. for about 8 minutes. long enough for us to have shut the generator off and put away all of the extension cords. we had to run out to catch power guy before he left to try, try again. so, off to hook up the generator and run the extension cords. for the second time. power was back on shortly after but this time we left the extension cords where they lay. my mom bought that generator last june. she has used it 4 times already. power guy said it is from squirrels getting in the transformer. since there are 1,298,576 squirrels (one less after last night) in their neighborhood i believe this to be a good investment. ho, ho, ho, hooooooooooooo. you'll shoot you're eye out, kid.

eat your heart out eva

get out your green acres music, hungarian accent and pitch fork. here comes another one.

eeeeedwardsburg is the place you see.
mice in my car is the life for me.

cars turnin' out so far and wide.
keep the suburbs just give me that countryside.

suh-burbia is where i'd rather stay.
i get lonely sitting here all day.
i just adore a city zoo.
dah-ling i love you but these people don't have a clue.

...director of operation
...in quite an odd location
...open space
...mental case

you are my wife.
good-bye city life.
edwardsburg we are there!

...nice

...this is sophie. we knew we were in trouble from the moment of conception with this one. i had blood pressure issues. she had heart troubles. i had heart troubles. and after a few unexpected stays at the hospital there she was all barely 6 pounds of her. a nurse asked us what her name was on the way to the o.r. before delivery and we said trouble. we couldn't have been further from the truth. she sleeps for 14 hours a night and never cries. although there are a few curiosities. she won't eat peas. she won't eat cottage cheese. and won't even think about lasagna. she is not my child. but we love her anyway...at least until she turns two.

naughty...

...this is will. he is two and you can tell. after twenty-four hours of labor he finally came into this world via an unplanned c-section. i told my doctor his horns were stuck. he asks for, and eats, pancakes and peas for lunch. he takes his pants off because he can. we have 1.800.gypsies on speed dial. we never call. even they would bring him back. he reads. all day and all night. if we tied his hands behind his back he couldn't talk. he loves baths. he hits the dog. he hits me. he kicks. and then he gives a kiss. we think he is bipolar. last night before bedtime he said, 'love you, momma' for the first time. as tears welled in my eyes i went to my to do list and crossed off lump of coal. i love you too, buddy.

zinger

tonight i made lasagna for dinner.

my husband came home from work and said, 'mmmmm, lasagna.'

i said, 'consider yourself laid.'

have a nice night, folks.

on the road. again.

my sister has informed me her family is moving. again. she got married some years ago and moved to wisconsin. then they moved to north carolina. then onto georgia. they currently live in kansas but not for long. i really think they are gypsies but they just won't admit it. i didn't even know my sister owned red, sparkly shoes let alone kicked them together. i can only assume the looming threat of being blown to smithereens had a hand in the decision. they are now finding their way back to north carolina. they can let me know when they move back out of north carolina so i can come and visit them again. i hate it. you see, there was an incident back then that has been burned in my brain and i will never forget it. hence, the ban. as far as i am concerned there are only 49 states in this great nation. before they moved there the first time i had bought my brother-in-law a smoker for christmas. i thought before our visit was over we could smoke a turkey breast. so, off to the store i go with my mother. we searched high and low for a turkey breast but couldn't seem to find one. now, you need to realize that my mom is the queen of finding things. when i was younger her favorite thing to ask me when i couldn't find something was 'where did you look, the ceiling?' we were quite confident that they didn't have any but wanted to ask to make sure so we approached the meat counter to inquire. meat counter lady slowly walked over to her right, pointed and said 'all you got to do is looook.' i almost did a one-armed hurdle over the meat counter and punched out what was left of her teeth. i think my mom even held her hand out a little as she knew what i was thinking. i wanted to reply with 'all you got to do is visit the dentist twice a year.' see you in a few years, kari, we will miss you.

rude awakening

i believe it was the great bob seger that sang a song about waking to the sound of thunder. i haven't had a good night's sleep since i don't know when (i will be sure and discuss this in detail at a later date) and so on the rare occasion that i have drifted off into a deep sleep and i am woken up by anything other than the fact that i am ready slightly irritates me. early this morning at 2:47 a.m. i awoke to the sound of a herd of snowmobiles. did i mention it was 2:47 a.m.? i am not talking one or two or even three...it was more like 6,784. it was like wheely and the chopper bunch were knocking on my window. va-rooom, chicka, chicka. i sure wish i knew where the herd lived so i could thank them.